Thoughts – July 17th, 2013 #ASMSG

After two days I finally can sit on my chair in front of my desk where my 27″ iMac is waiting, its keyboard hunkering for my soft touches.

I’ve been lying down most of the time as walking or sitting hurts so much. I’ve had this problem since childhood and ambling is one of the triggers and it ends up with some excruciating pain in my lower back. A sense of pressure than rapidly becomes unbearable, radiating around my hips and pulsing down to my knees.

“Wear”, the doctor told me dryly a few months ago when for the first time in years I wasn’t able to go to work. He had been closely examining the MRI’s I had made a week before.

He scribbled something on a prescription and handed it over to me.
“It’s based on Aceclofenac a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug. Take it only when you really need it. When it just hurts take some paracetamol-based product. It will help,” he explained still looking bored and utterly uninterested as he always does. Maybe a hint of Ebola would have excited him more.
I left his office and went straight to the pharmacy and back outside I took a pill swallowing it with saliva.
Boy was I glad I got home 10′ later as the man with the hammer was hitting me as a madman. Heavy stuff this Aceclofenac as I was out for most part of the day.

It has been several months since the last time this hurt as hell but the pain is always there, sometimes barely noticeable, only a far away and almost unnoticeable thunder stroke near an invisible horizon.

I have no idea what triggered it this time but at noon I was not able to walk at all.

I took half a pill but that didn’t help so I took the other half as I had a rendezvous with Princess at 13:20. I was scheduled picking her up at work and driving her to a nearby clinic for a routine pre-emptive cancer check-up and I would rather have died than phone her and tell her I could not make it even if she would have understood.
Some things a man HAS to do for his girl.

Princess came over last evening, we talked and went to bed and made delicious rough love before falling asleep. No playing and no spanking. Little A. sleeping in the other room, next to ours, is an intimidating fact.

Before we fell asleep she smiled at me, her eyes so beautiful, glowing with intense love, she whispered she missed us playing.

Yes, I did too. But biting her lower lip, scratching her behind violently, pinching her nipples hard and fiercely pulling her hair is a good substitute for the whipping, the bondage, wax dripping and all that other stuff I do to her body so Princess looses it, warped away to another planet so I can sooth her.

Pain and lust, such an intense combination and I would so love Princess give me some agony too. Princess knows what I love, knows what makes me go mad.
I want her nails to scratch my skin in long and deep hauls while I pleasure myself.

I want to go to work and enjoy the irritation of T-shirt or shirt on my bruised skin for days.

I remember Princess doing that to me in a very intense way but it seems so long ago.

I wonder.
Is a submissive allowed to inflict pain on her Dominant if He asked?

Or am I not a Dominant but a switch?

Hell, I can see myself in front of some full-of-myself smiling shrink.
Hey doc, what am I?
Know that I enjoy giving pain but receiving it, when I wish or demand it, makes me feel good too.
What do you think?
Doc?
Are you still there?

Rest assured.
I am a Dominant. I know I am.
I have always been.

But to be honest, I am a Dominant with a kink.
I love pain too and it is a great feeling when Princess administers it to me.

Red 'n Green

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